Thank you so much for this post. I managed to read through Neko's post (which was only flagged for me through this post - instantly subscribed) while listening to People Got a Lotta Nerve and it just broke me. How did this not leak through even a little bit into the news? I was humming his music for a week b/c of all the press and it's just gross. I'm so sorry that this happened and that only a few of us seem to care.
i must confess to have been ho hum about this kind of stuff. another man, another crime. but neko's writing woke me up, made me upset again (in a good way) so i just needed to pass it on. thanks for picking it!
I appreciate your essay! It's well-said, and unfortunately a tale as old as time. I have encountered far too many people in the public eye who use and abuse their positions. At this point, I can't assume anyone is worth lionizing.
One thing about paid subscribers. I considered it, but I don't want to give Substack any money.
as for substack. i totally get it. next month i'll offer a recurring paypal option for those who don't want to support substack. i don't paywall my content anyway.
First of all, thank you for this. Neko's post and the disconnect between the outrageous tributes and the horrifying stories have all been rattling around in my head all week. The thing I keep thinking -- every time something like this comes up, both all the stuff that came up during MeToo and now with this -- is: imagine having all of that power and *that's what you do with it*. You know? It's a little like being a literal trillionaire only so you can be the world's most embarrassing troll. It's all of a piece with bigger and more asinine gendered shit, of course, but that's what my brain keeps scraping against right now esp with this situation. Not being a creepy asshole is both easy and free! sigh.
The thing you said about people raised as female being held to a different visual standard reminded me of a maddening thing that happened when I was in musical theatre writing grad school at NYU. A married (straight) collaborator team came in to talk to my class -- and at this point, they weren't really well known as a team, but within a couple years they were about to be. He was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, she was in a fucking skirt suit and all done up, blah blah. And she said something like, "FYI, we just came from a meeting. Just a word of warning, ladies, you won't be able to dress like he is right now in these situations." And her partner laughed and shrugged and said, "It's true!" And I was so angry that I couldn't stop shaking for an hour afterwards, and none of my (mostly male) classmates understood. But, like, she wasn't wrong -- it was more the laugh and shrug from her partner (or the lack of solidarity, I guess?) that stuck with me. They're both doing very, very well, it's not even about them -- it's just the pure principle of the thing. I fucking hate it so much.
Q and i talked about this alot too in re: to what a composer is supposed to look like when they meet a theater - kind of crazy, but not too crazy. just wild enough to be an "artist". for them it looked like funky earrings. for me... big hair. wtf all that energy could be going somewhere else! and YOURE amazing
Who among us doesn't wish they had more financial security??
Almost 20 years ago, when I was in grad school, I participated in Georgetown's Law & Philosophy Colloquium. One of the scholars who presented gave me a very bad feeling -- my lizard hindbrain was going off. A history of harassment and conduct later came out, and he was shuffled, first, from one to department to another, within the same Ivy League university, and later forced out, only to get a position at another Ivy.
The degree to which this man has been protected by supposedly woke, progressive institutions is reprehensible. It's kind of beside the point, but I don't think his work is all that impressive.
I'm not a performer, so I can't speak to the difficulties of covering Neko. But I am a writer, and one of my ND gifts is that I pick up on verbal patterns quickly and easily; I often write lines by using the structure of other people's (meter, scansion, etc.) as a skeleton. iI I've heard a decent amount of someone's work, when I hear new stuff, I'm pretty good at predicting where the lyrics are going.
Neko is an exception to this. I can't get inside her lyrics. They surprise (and delight) me, which is a rare joy. I kind of look at what she does as sorcery.
Thank you so much for this post. I managed to read through Neko's post (which was only flagged for me through this post - instantly subscribed) while listening to People Got a Lotta Nerve and it just broke me. How did this not leak through even a little bit into the news? I was humming his music for a week b/c of all the press and it's just gross. I'm so sorry that this happened and that only a few of us seem to care.
i must confess to have been ho hum about this kind of stuff. another man, another crime. but neko's writing woke me up, made me upset again (in a good way) so i just needed to pass it on. thanks for picking it!
I appreciate your essay! It's well-said, and unfortunately a tale as old as time. I have encountered far too many people in the public eye who use and abuse their positions. At this point, I can't assume anyone is worth lionizing.
One thing about paid subscribers. I considered it, but I don't want to give Substack any money.
thanks for reading! and appreciate your comment.
as for substack. i totally get it. next month i'll offer a recurring paypal option for those who don't want to support substack. i don't paywall my content anyway.
First of all, thank you for this. Neko's post and the disconnect between the outrageous tributes and the horrifying stories have all been rattling around in my head all week. The thing I keep thinking -- every time something like this comes up, both all the stuff that came up during MeToo and now with this -- is: imagine having all of that power and *that's what you do with it*. You know? It's a little like being a literal trillionaire only so you can be the world's most embarrassing troll. It's all of a piece with bigger and more asinine gendered shit, of course, but that's what my brain keeps scraping against right now esp with this situation. Not being a creepy asshole is both easy and free! sigh.
The thing you said about people raised as female being held to a different visual standard reminded me of a maddening thing that happened when I was in musical theatre writing grad school at NYU. A married (straight) collaborator team came in to talk to my class -- and at this point, they weren't really well known as a team, but within a couple years they were about to be. He was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, she was in a fucking skirt suit and all done up, blah blah. And she said something like, "FYI, we just came from a meeting. Just a word of warning, ladies, you won't be able to dress like he is right now in these situations." And her partner laughed and shrugged and said, "It's true!" And I was so angry that I couldn't stop shaking for an hour afterwards, and none of my (mostly male) classmates understood. But, like, she wasn't wrong -- it was more the laugh and shrug from her partner (or the lack of solidarity, I guess?) that stuck with me. They're both doing very, very well, it's not even about them -- it's just the pure principle of the thing. I fucking hate it so much.
Anyway, you're amazing. Thank you thank you.
ugh!! and yes. <singing>tale as old as time</>
Q and i talked about this alot too in re: to what a composer is supposed to look like when they meet a theater - kind of crazy, but not too crazy. just wild enough to be an "artist". for them it looked like funky earrings. for me... big hair. wtf all that energy could be going somewhere else! and YOURE amazing
Who among us doesn't wish they had more financial security??
Almost 20 years ago, when I was in grad school, I participated in Georgetown's Law & Philosophy Colloquium. One of the scholars who presented gave me a very bad feeling -- my lizard hindbrain was going off. A history of harassment and conduct later came out, and he was shuffled, first, from one to department to another, within the same Ivy League university, and later forced out, only to get a position at another Ivy.
The degree to which this man has been protected by supposedly woke, progressive institutions is reprehensible. It's kind of beside the point, but I don't think his work is all that impressive.
I'm not a performer, so I can't speak to the difficulties of covering Neko. But I am a writer, and one of my ND gifts is that I pick up on verbal patterns quickly and easily; I often write lines by using the structure of other people's (meter, scansion, etc.) as a skeleton. iI I've heard a decent amount of someone's work, when I hear new stuff, I'm pretty good at predicting where the lyrics are going.
Neko is an exception to this. I can't get inside her lyrics. They surprise (and delight) me, which is a rare joy. I kind of look at what she does as sorcery.
i have that same lyric prediction gift and she constantly surprises me too!! thx for this comment and for listening!
"Bob Dylan's lyrics make complete logical sense to me, but I can't tie shoelaces." :-)