late last week, i taped a conversation with the legendary audie cornish of npr’s all things considered. is it too early to call her a legend? i think not. it was a privilege to speak with her. a moment undiminished by the fact that as of this writing the piece has not yet aired!
obviously the opportunity to speak on a platform as large and respected as NPR’s flagship show is a big deal. i certainly felt a lot of pressure to get it right. i’m not sure how commonly known this is, but musicians and authors etc pay an enormous amount of money to even pitch to a show like this. seriously yall, you could make a down payment on a modest home with the money it takes to hire a good publicist for the minimal amount of time required to even have a chance to pitch ATC.
and yet, i got a random email though my website from an ATC producer last tuesday asking if i’d be on the show to talk about being an artist in the pandemic. would i? hell yes i would.
to cut to the chase, i got very stressed out about this. i wrote myself lots of notes. i called friends to sound out theories and gather correct information. i woke up on each of 3 days already practicing answers to hypothetical questions. so, erin, how has the pandemic been for you? what exactly was in the recently passed “save our stages” portion of the COVID relief bill and why is it important? which of your favorite venues has closed?
(spoiler alert: none yet)
finally friday afternoon came, and audie and i chatted for about 20 minutes, an eternity with someone as busy as she is. who know how much of this will even make the final piece. my bet? about 4 minutes, if i'm lucky. 4 minutes would be amazing! knowing this, i tried to pack each of my answers with important info in soundbyte-size phrases. this is just the game. she knows it! i know it! the segment producer knows it!
after i hung up, i was overrun with noisy negative thoughts - was i too happy? not serious enough for the gravity of pandemic? was i speaking out of turn about others’ experiences? who was i to speak on any of this? i was flummoxed by a few of her questions. could anyone tell? had i wasted this very precious opportunity? did i do a good job?
i know by the time i get to that final thought, it isnt about my conversation with audie cornish anymore. we’re in therapy territory, which is decidedly not what this newsletter is.
so! here’s what this month’s newsletter is about. in prepping for this interview, i had the opportunity to really think about what is the artist’s role in an era like the one we find ourselves in now. the conversation began around the question of how i was doing financially and emotionally. the answer to that is simple: i am doing great. i'm making enough to get by, which is all i need. most importantly, i'm busier and feel like i have more purpose than ever. but why???
i think the reason lies precisely in the nature of artists. we live for moments like this. they call us to use all our skills. we are cultural first responders. i dont exclusively mean hot-takes, though that is one way we might rush to the scene to help. we also might nap. what i mean is we are the first line of processors. we are the first to grapple with the moment, to try to express it, and then share that expression. we stir the pot. we start the conversation and keep it moving. we advocate for those whose voices have smaller platforms than our own. we hold up mirrors with our work. the stuff you're afraid to say, we say it. the contradictions you don't have time to ponder, we ruminate on.
the more i think about it, the more i like this idea of being a cultural first responder. it makes me think of driving an "art ambulance". i can picture my own personal art ambulance very clearly. its a 1940s pickup truck in a patchwork of colors, retro-fitted to run on solar. when the emergency calls come in, i turn on my siren (a mono-synth version of reveille of course) and drive towards the crisis. in the case of this pandemic that has looked like fund-raising videos for non-profits i love, vulnerable audio essays, new music about love in the time of corona, lots of one on one teaching. and yes, numerous virtual birthday and anniversary messages for folks.
it has also looked like losing sleep for a few days, laboring over answers to questions i don’t know yet, wondering whether i did a good job or not, but still opening my mouth and trying to put it all into words.
i still dont know how that npr producer found me, but no matter, when the call came, i answered it. and that's what i'll continue to do as long as folks need it. whatever you need, whenever you need it, i’ll be here, my art ambulance parked in my driveway at the ready.
come find me!
x erin
ps - for the next 4 weeks i'm doing a cool project: a series of events where you can "watch me work". more info below or RSVP here.
¡ME GUSTA! : SOME OF MY FAVORITE THINGS
3:20 of happiness! no matter that by the directors' own admission it is ripped off from the iconic african-american nicholas brothers... or does it matter?
doesn't the concept of "queer ecology" sound amazing? it is!
a beautiful & interactive close read of early cubist work, which honestly i never understood or cared about til reading this
i just finished the audio book of this extraordinary biography of the lakota holy man black elk
a british tv series about a veterinarian in 1930's yorkshire? count me in!!
i've always thought record shops should be organized by the reason you need music, not the artist. now a book store in seattle has done that
unlike the bernie meme, sea chanty tiktok is not played out
a fantastic & heartbreaking long form audio piece about the last two northern white rhinos in existence