today’s audio comes to us from a time machine in a river.
way back in 2009, i ran a series of live streamed fundraising concerts called Cabin Fever. it’s hard to explain how difficult and radical this was at the time. there was no kickstarter; youtube was just beginning; not many folks had mobile phones. the idea of turning on your computer to watch something took some doing, if your internet connection could even handle such an endeavor.
still, the original Cabin Fever broadcasts were a huge success, launching my record “Hundreds of Lions” and becoming a regular series that i have returned to many more times for a total of 10 episodes. you can watch them all here, plus see amazing photos from each of the broadcasts.
in july of 2009, in the original series of broadcasts, i thought it would be fun to make a hard thing harder and live-stream from a live stream, the south river that runs just below my porch. the theme of our show would, of course, be water.
besides that fact that all the broadcasts originate in and around my house, Cabin Fever also has a tradition of special guests, musical and actual neighbors coming by to join the fun. the list of friends who have come on the shows is long and delightful.
one of the special guests that day was my friend josé ayerve, the main songwriter and singer in my favorite rock band SPOUSE. i love SPOUSE more than i love radiohead or U2, their nearest comparisons in my music collections. the fact that SPOUSE are friends, that i have guested on their records, that we have played shows together never ceases to floor me. in 2021, another dream came true when SPOUSE joined me for the Kiss Off Kiss tour, opening the shows then being my band for the night. if you were lucky enough to see any of those shows, you know how perfectly the glove fit the hand and the hand rocked out.
so! today’s audio is me and josé sitting in my river, playing a song he wrote especially for the day. i had my casio keyboard on my lap to provide the beat. josé had his trusty nylon string. it had rained alot the night before, so the usually placid river was running… a little high.
i bring all this up because on july 30, SPOUSE and i are doing a rare show together at the stone church in brattleboro VT. i don’t usually use this pod to highlight certain shows, it is meant for an audience i know is listening from around the world. but i do suggest traveling for this show. josé lives in florida now. as you know that i have mostly retired from shows to focus on composing, teaching, and this pod-essay fusion.
and yet, part of the reason i make this pod is to keep going with what shows provided- connection with you, a chance to share my songs and worldview, and the opportunity to spark conversations about arcana, memory, nostalgia, the odd trivia that makes up the Fax of Life. with this in mind, i’m trying something new and welcoming my first guest to Fax of Life for a conversation about reconnection, tennis, and wearing earplugs.
EM: José Ayerve, welcome to Fax of Life. You are my first guest.
JA: Oh my gosh, Erin, this is such a pleasure. Thank you for having me.
EM: Here's the first question I want to ask of my first guest on the podcast, which is, José what are the facts of your life these days?
JA: Oh, wow. That is a fantastic question. I'm so excited to answer this question.
EM: It could be the F A X or the F A C T S,
JA: Both. Let's start with the CTS ending of the word facts. And I think right now I'm at a point in my life where the facts of life are reconnect with yourself after spending so much time involved in the process of moving back to the United States from afar.
EM: Because you were in Ecuador for how many years?
JA: I was there for about seven years or so and my spouse and our five dogs, and I had to find <laugh> somewhere to live in the States. That was a whole other process that's worthy of a
EM: Six part podcast. Two guys, five dogs in Florida.
JA: And landing in a state with such a diversity of, of laws that are meant to harm a particular section or sector of the population, or segment, excuse me, segment of the population. Um, yeah, that's a very challenging thing. My facts of life right now are reconnect, reconnect with, uh, my passion, which is music, which is creating music, creating songs, um, uh, my passion for tennis, uh, my, uh, exploration of things, whether it's an idea, whether it's, um, part of music, et cetera.
EM: Is there something you do every day to enhance or enact these facts of life?
JA: I try to take full advantage of whatever time I have throughout the course of the day where I'm not taking care of dogs, running errands cooking or cleaning, attending meetings for work, translating documents for work. I try to take, even if it's like a 20 minute window, I do my best to take a power nap or go outside and just appreciate where I am, where I'm living. I've started getting into the habit of, a friend of mine taught me this, of saying, okay, I am Jose, today is July 4th. I am participating in a podcast with my good friend Erin, and I am being present. I'm enjoying this. So that helps center what I'm doing, and it helps me understand that right now, the only thing that I can really effect is what's happening in my present. So that's one of the things that I do. And then the other thing is, obviously I play tennis. I try to play three or four times a week, and I have to say Fort Lauderdale, Florida is a wonderful, wonderful place to play tennis, especially because it's got such a big LGBTQAI + community. And we have our own tennis league, which is part of this international circuit, and it's amazing.
EM: Well, that, that leads me to my next question, which was, I of course know that you are a voracious tennis player. I am as well. I think people don't necessarily know this about us, right? Because there's this way that people put musicians in a box of the non-athletic, perhaps it's like an outsider status or something, that somehow we wouldn't participate in something that's in the center of culture so much as sports. But so many musicians that I know are super athletic, actually. So we have tennis in common. I'm curious if you remember the last time we played?
JA: Yes. It was at Highland Park in Greenfield, and I was just there yesterday.
EM: Clay Courts at Highland Park in Greenfield. So my memory is the first set you kicked my ass, right? It's like something like six-1 or six-0. I couldn't return your fantastic serve. We hadn't played in a number of years. And I was like, holy, Jose. And then <laugh> and then second set, I held my own. I still lost second set, but I do feel like I held my own and started to make you run a little bit. Like this is my, my tennis strategy, because I'm not tall. Which is like run, run, run. Get to everything. Get to everything, return everything. Stay in the point as long as possible. What is your tennis strategy?
JA: What is my tennis strategy? Well, first, if I may just add to what you were saying, I remember that second set being a highly competitive set. It was where you were just getting to all of the balls. I was trying to move you side to side, and you were like, no, no, no, <laugh>, this ball is going back to you. And you were kind of forcing the errors, which is, which is great. And that's a wonderful way to play.
EM: Yeah. Sometimes it's just wait, wait for someone else. Wait for someone else to make a mistake. <laugh>,
JA: My strategy for tennis has evolved a little bit. I am a little more patient, so I'm trying to focus on building the points. I'm trying to focus on problem solving. And I think this is why tennis is such an appealing sport for anyone with a creative mind. Because it's about, oh, okay, all, all of a sudden I'm, I'm down 15-40 and I'm about to lose my serve. What can I do differently? Or what, how should I approach these next these next few points? Can I get it back to deuce? And the biggest thing, and I guess, this is the answer to your question, I stopped thinking about how I got to that score. If I'm down in the score, I stopped thinking about how I got there. I'm here. That's it. I accept that I'm here.
EM: Tennis is such a mental game, right? It's such a mental game. And it's, for me, it's like a barometer of what is happening in my life. So if I'm stressed or something, I'm not gonna be able to go hit balls. If I'm distracted by something, I'm not gonna be able to go hit balls and do what I wanna do. If I'm feeling at peace, if I'm feeling focused, if I'm feeling settled, my mind is nearly blank. Which actually lines up with your daily practice of your facts of life, actually. Which, which is just to stop and say, this is where I am right now, not where I was.
hey yall - man, i love josé! we’ll get back to the conversation in just a moment. but first i want to pop in with a little biz biz.
i’ve got some wonderful shows in the northeast in july and august - my show with SPOUSE on july 30, and a hiking concert on august 12. plus this fall i’ll be on tour with Welcome To Night Vale in the South, so come through all yall.
a reminder that my teaching practice #CABINCOLLEGE is open and taking students right now. i’d love to help you improve your songwriting, make an album, develop a music curriculum, or learn how to record at home. erinmckeown.com/cabincollege for all the details.
and finally, thank you to everyone who subscribes!! if you are a monthly subscriber, you’ll notice that the cost has risen to $7. still less than that bespoke martini you order several times a night, or a month. for those of you that subscribe yearly, your price has remained the same, $55. if you’re not a subscriber, now is a great time to convert. you don’t get anything special or different, you just get the warm glow of supporting an artist who really appreciates it. thank you!!
EM: Jose, if you could send a fax anywhere to anyone living or dead, what would you send? We're gonna start by filling out the cover sheet. Now, did you send faxes in your life?
JA: Yes. Cuz I'm older.
EM: Right? There's a small window of people, probably people who were like sentient, cognizant from like the early 1980s to like maybe the early two thousands, right? You might have done business with a fax machine. It's part of why I love the Fax of Life is there's a very specific technology that is no longer relevant.
JA: But. Sorry to interrupt.
EM: Has someone asked you to send a fax recently and you can't?
JA: Actually I've had two fax experiences in the last year.
EM: All right. Let's hear them.
JA: One is in healthcare, you are not allowed to transmit. I think it's because of HIPAA laws. You're not allowed to send private health information via email or text message or anything like that. But if you need to share the results of some test or if you have to share a report with another provider, fax is accepted. I had to also fax a form to the IRS so that they can release my refund, which I'm not used to saying the word refund.
EM: Okay. So if you had to send a fax, where would you go?
JA: I would send it to myself circa 1978. It would be an interdimensional, not interdimensional, it would be an intertemporal device. It would be something that hasn't been invented yet or created yet. And I'd probably need to go find the best sorcerers available. It would be amazing.
EM: Let's fill out the cover sheet. Who's it to?
JA: So to me, in 1978.
EM: I don't know why the cover sheet always asks this, but do you know the number of pages?
JA: Well, in this case it would be two.
EM: Two. Okay, great. Now /
JA: The cover sheet counts as one, right?
EM: Okay, this is a profound question. I don't know the answer to that. Does it?
JA: My personal answer is yes, it counts.
EM: Okay, great. Okay, so two pages. Subject line on the cover sheet.
JA: Earplugs.
EM: Okay. And are you CCing anyone?
JA: Myself in 1979, 80, 81, 82 <laugh>.
EM: Great. Okay. Multiple multiple copy recipients. And do we mark urgent?
JA: Yes.
EM: Do we mark it for review? Do we mark, please reply?
JA: Urgent. No need to reply.
EM: Okay. Now that we have the cover sheet, tell us about the fax.
JA: Okay, so the message is simple. Wear earplugs in church.
EM: In church?
JA: Yes. In church.
EM: Wait, why church?
JA: Because that's where so many bad ideas originate. I hate to say it, but in my experience, that's where alot of the hangups that have precluded or impeded my ability to advocate for myself, my ability It's growing up in a very Catholic, ultra Catholic home. I feel like that did not do good things for my self-esteem, my self-image or my self-love.
EM: Jose, that is a beautiful answer. You're operating on a level way above where I'm operating on. Because I was like, oh, wear earplugs. I was just like, oh, you're thinking about how your hearing isn't as great now, <laugh> as it used to be, which is a concern as a musician, right? For sure. But you're operating on a whole other level. You are talking about fundamental personal emotional earplugs. To mitigate the damage.
JA: To filter out the noise and mitigate damage, just like you say.
EM: Which is why we wear earplugs, right? We wear for our own protection. We wear it for our own advocacy. I love putting earplugs in because they just sort of make my world delineated. And it feels very safe in some ways, but it's protection for future self. So that makes so much sense. Okay, so we're gonna send. We're sending that fax off. It's done. The Fax of Life have helped you achieve that. Thank you!
JA: That's such a therapeutic thing. Thank you. This is amazing.
well, that’s it! the first guest of Fax of Life is in the books. i think i’ll have more! please let me know what you think of my conversation with josé. and if there are any other fax-related questions i should have asked.
meantime, enjoy this gorgeous north american summer / dumpster fire and i’ll be back in august.
x erin
ps - carl on a rock!
¡ME GUSTA! : SOME OF MY FAVORITE THINGS!
hooray!! the album that i produced for mo pepin is now out!! check out “gravity” on bandcamp, spotify, or apple. then watch and share this charming video of the title track.
crystal dunn is my favorite player on the USWNT. not just because she is an amazing athlete, but because she is small and powerful, like someone else we know.
speaking of the USWNT, have a happy cry while you watch the announcement of the World Cup Roster.
omg and then keep crying as you listen to this story of two golden retrievers who hike together every day. and then watch this short documentary about them, as you keep weeping.
i’m just going to say it: i can’t stand the sound of pickleball.
need to feel ill? learn more about clarence and ginni thomas’s love. and then listen to this pod about what and why clarence believes what he believes. it’s horrifying/fascinating.
more politics: an epic, responsibly reported takedown of yet another privileged white man who thinks he’s an outsider, the chaos-agent RFK, jr.
palate cleanser? a guy who sells responsibly sourced medical skeletons.
UPCOMING SHOWS
July 30 - Brattleboro CT
Stone Church with SPOUSE
TICKETS
August 12 - Dalton MA
Scenic Songs Hike + Concert at Notchview
TICKETS
Oct 14 - Nov 11 - Seattle WA
Miss You Like Hell at Strawberry Theatre
MORE INFO
Nov 9 - Washington DC
performing as The Weather with Welcome to Night Vale
TICKETS
Nov 10 - Charlottesville VA
performing as The Weather with Welcome to Night Vale
TICKETS
Nov 11 - Richmond VA
performing as The Weather with Welcome to Night Vale
TICKETS
Nov 12 - Durham NC
performing as The Weather with Welcome to Night Vale
TICKETS
Nov 16 - Tampa FL
performing as The Weather with Welcome to Night Vale
TICKETS
Nov 17 - Ft Lauderdale FL
performing as The Weather with Welcome to Night Vale
TICKETS
Nov 18 - Ponte Vedra Beach FL
performing as The Weather with Welcome to Night Vale
TICKETS
Nov 19 - Atlanta GA
performing as The Weather with Welcome to Night Vale
TICKETS
March 8 -24, 2024 - Woodstock GA
Miss You Like Hell at Woodstock Arts
TICKETS
If you have further questions or concerns about COVID protocols, please contact the venues directly.
Reminder, Erin does not appear in productions of Miss You Like Hell
wear earplugs (with jose ayerve)